Finally the moment I’ve been waiting for the wind has picked up and the weather reports forbidding
The roads might go slick with ice and could start cars skidding

The weather forecasters were in agreement, their highly touted high resolution radar does foresee
There’s a chance of sleet, slush or snow if the temperature varies by just a degree

I did what any red blooded male would do when a cold front was moving through
I checked my new SUV for gas and the fridge for an ample supply of cold brew

And to impress the little lady, I pulled around a ladder and swept out the gutters
I also checked the weather seals on the windows and oiled the hinges on the shutters

“I think you’re in overkill,” stated the little lady. “Especially with that big ladder you’ve been dragging.
Besides we shouldn’t have a worry with all the money you spent on that new station wagon.”

“It’s not a station wagon,” I snapped. “Show me a wagon with 355 horsepower and four wheel drive.”
“Whatever,” she countered. “Even without it we have plenty of Spam and would probably survive.”

“But what would happen if a medical emergency happened,” I said. “And someone went into labor?”
With all the eye rolling she could summon replied. “This is a retirement community name someone under 75 who is a neighbor.”

“Ah,” I responded. “You forgot about the mass stampede to the grocery store for milk and bread.”
“Well that would solve our problem,” she grumbled. “You’re lactose intolerant and I’m gluten free. We’d both be dead.”