Search

An Observer of Life in Bad Poetry

Commentary on Daily Life, Politics and Sports

Open Search
Category

daily life

Operation Potato Head: The New Woke Parent Board Game

Back in the day children were delighted to receive the games of Mr Potato Head and Operation

With Mr Potato Head, kids could spend hours with a spud and various facial features creating a hilarious figuration

With Operation a battery powered character was “operated” on with tweezers as the participants tried to remove body parts and not light the patient’s nose

But that was then as some of today’s teenagers are the gender creation of a sad game today’s woke parents chose

Hopping on the gender dysphoria bandwagon, parents feel because little Johnny was found trying to balance in mama’s heels he wants to be a girl

A hilarious TicTok video was produced as little Johnny wobbled about and with a dress supplied mama, tried to whirl

Tomboy Suzie likes baseball and to play with Tonka trucks so let’s do a radical mastectomy and fill her full of never ending shots of testosterone

All because of something that was read on a website while browsing for hair products on the phone

So the game continues as now real body parts are removed and other surgically manufactured parts are substituted in their place

Egged on by frustrated and cruel educators and misguided health clinicians, the little kids were handed a heavy burden in the human race

But the woke parents never pass an opportunity for a photo op to pose with the mirthless human they created

As the poor kids bravely stand next to the smiling parent as their lot in life had already been dictated

Would this child choose this lifestyle if the parents had waited until this child turned eighteen?

A lifetime of ostracism, looks of ridicule, and the continual pain of hormone shots all because a parent decided they had a right to alter a DNA gene

So the new world had turned kids playing a game into parents playing a game with kids

And then be furious with the few states that this barbaric game with children the law forbids

0

You Already Are A Pre-existing Condition

The dictionary defines a pre-existing condition as a health problem that exists before applying for a new health plan

The fact you are a citizen is now a pre-existing condition, as your life and all activities involved will be determined by an implanted chip and a transaction scan

The man had been waving his chip implanted hand over the gas pump reader and yet the pump hadn’t reset

This was puzzling as he knew for a fact that all bills had been paid and he had no debt

The warning flashed on the display screen stating the transaction was declined and to contact his local data bank

With increasing dread the man drove home as the almighty data bank stored all his personal information. He was just thankful he could get home with the gas left in his tank

It turns out this individual had not received his biannual booster shot and all activities would cease until that was achieved

The government, in selling the idea of total convenience, had implanted chips in its population for control purposes and once again to its countrymen they deceived

The chip was the ultimate tool in big brother’s totalitarian jurisdiction

The now mandatory chip was the missing piece in regulating citizen freedom and the major tool in government constriction

The chip reports all movement, medical records, financial transactions, and utility use

Though once promoted as a cure all for credit cards, interest rates, and cash, the chip had turned into a nightmare of government abuse

Now required on all newborns, the umbilical cord is clipped, a hand is implanted, and a digital number is then assigned

The robotic medical community will then know when the infant is ready for the required barrage of shots and if the schedule is not met the parents will be fined

Sixty years later the chip will determine what meds can be allowed to either extend life or speed up death

It turns out this individual was treated for a weakened heart so the chip decided it was best to hurry along this man’s last breath

The insurance companies had a field day as the chip showed this individual wasn’t going to be a perfect specimen and charged a higher rate

The data bank also knew this man’s financial situation was such the government would be able to rake in taxes from his estate

So it would be prudent to delete this person, reboot the chip, and begin again with another child

As the power brokers in DC sit around their power lunch and wonder why they are so reviled

0

If Jaws was Filmed By Today’s Leftist Mob

In 1975 the film Jaws was unleashed on an unsuspecting public. Since then very few people have ventured into the ocean without having a Jaws moment

In 2021 a new creature was thrust on the still unsuspecting public capable of spreading anger and fear and all who disagreed were considered an unworthy opponent

The leftist mob had become the modern Jaws, unblinking, unfeeling and chewing up everything in its path

The reasoning behind this madness is to promote hatred and push their agenda to the forefront. Any opposition will be subject to their wrath

Just suppose for a moment quotes from the film were used in today’s socialistic political scene to secure their vote

Using probably the most famous line from the movie, to unpack all the demands from this woke group. “You’re gonna need a bigger boat”

“You yell barracuda and everybody says Huh? What? You yell shark and we’ve got a full scale panic on our hands”

Applying the convoluted logic of the pandemic, yelling flu and everyone stays the course. Yell killer covid and panicked citizens are forced to do what the ignorant elite commands

“I just found out a little girl was killed here last week and you knew but you let people go swimming anyway and now my boy is dead”

The fetanyl poison being spread by the Chinese and the border cartels is taking a huge toll. The White House knows this but to pinch off the drug flow at the border would interfere with the migrant spread

“I can do anything. I’m the Chief of Police”

Biden feels this way also as he sends his puppet in Ukraine more cash and a new weapons release

“I’m familiar with the fact that you are going to ignore this problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass”

By surrounding himself with his own lapdogs, Biden has tanked the economy, strangled the military, and run America out of gas

“Well this was no boating accident. It was a shark”

America, bruised and humiliated by the intentional but ineffectual blundering leadership of this socialist government, is still standing as most of the punches had missed their mark

“Slow ahead, I can do slow ahead. Why don’t you come down and chum some of this shit”

America has long since figured that the daily slog of depressing news from DC is really formed in the office of the demented twit

And so it goes, a classic movie that is modernized to reflect a New World Order

Highlighted by the terror that is now real, from bad public schools, a manufactured war, and an open border

0

Granny Hung A Telemarketer

The cross arm creaked as the deceased swung in the breeze. Ironically the body was hanged from a phone pole.

Granny was fogging her oxygen mask as she wheeled away from the scene wrapped tightly in her stole

It seems the patients at Shady Acres Retirement Home had enough of the sincere sounding hucksters calling all the residents on their phones

Urgent requests came in daily advising money or credit card info is needed to pay off a grandchild’s multiple student loans

Or maybe for a few dollars given to a charity organization, little Sally might be able to take her first steps

And if you need a minute to retrieve your credit card numbers, you may then give them to one of our courteous reps

The next call coming in might be a concerned citizen with a foreign accent advising that an important package had been delivered to him by mistake

He then states he is broke and since it’s a certified delivery, to forward it to you, $200 is what it would take

An hour later was a message stating that signing up for this “special senior care” car warranty, one would never have to worry again about your car breaking down

Seeing how the kids took her car keys away five years ago, Granny figured she might be able to trick this clown

So between breaks in the bingo game the group of granny “rowdies” devised a scheme

They would lure a telemarketer into their lair with promises of riches, property and if necessary sex to complete his dream

Meeting at the picnic table behind the home, the starry eyed slickster showed up only to receive a hard right cross from a crutch and multiple blows from an oxygen tank

Steadying his battered body on a chair and with the supp hose wrapped tightly around his neck, Granny gave the chair a yank

“Call us now, you twerp!” yelled the group in a show of solidarity

And with that the group returned to their bingo game and continued their discussion of aches, tired cafeteria food, grandchildren, and irregularity

0

But Do You Really Trust Them?

The microphones lined the podium and the speakers were using their practiced reassuring voices

The air, water, and soil were safe and the towns people may move back in as if they had any choices

Sipping from the bottled water and nothing from the tap, the “experts” were stating the coast was clear

Like anyone on the podium has experience with a ten car derailment releasing deadly toxins but now acting like no one has anything to fear

This group had made a decision for a controlled burn reducing explosion concerns and hopefully the airborne poisons would dissipate in the wind

As proof one could follow the trail of fish floating on the river surface and the dead livestock in the field to tell where the chemical smoke had thinned

“People may now return to their homes,” stated the government official. “Continue using bottled water and everything else should be okay”

Confidence among the locals is not high as we all know this will soon be yesterday’s news and will shortly be swept away

What are the consequences 1 year, 5 years, 10 years from now? Will the remaining livestock be okay to be milked, butchered, or just graze? Will new babies be born with scales?

Will your home value reflect in the real estate downward spiral of depreciation and diminished sales?

But that’s okay because the g-men who couldn’t wait to catch the first flight out-of-town all assured the citizens the air quality was back to status quo

Just ignore the fact that your bedroom will now be illuminated at night because under the sheets your genitals will glow

0

Liar’s Pursuit: A New Drinking Game

The State of the Union speech was droning on, beer cans were strewn across the table and many more littered the floor

The drinking game had ended. Three participants had passed out and the fourth’s head was in toilet. The group had long quit keeping score

The night had started innocently enough as the rules were simple. Every time Biden told an obvious lie everyone had to chug a beer

Only thirty minutes in, out of suds and sobriety, the group needed to make a beer run but had no one to volunteer

This naive group didn’t realize that to keep the Globalist and leftist agenda flowing

Bigger lies needed to piled on existing lies to keep this anti-American disease growing

No mask or lockdown can keep this disease from spreading. Developed in Washington’s lab of disorder this mental pandemic is to be considered a true gain of function

Thrust on most Americans by a small angry group that demands complete surrender without any compunction

The appointed figurehead continues to lie to fit his needs and then runs away, tight lipped, like the miserable vindictive coward he is

While yelling from the podium how everything wrong is everyone’s fault but his

As his trained seals in the audience stood, flapped their flippers and tooted their horns

The few people watching this charade looked out the window at the shambles this administration enforces and for the simple days of yesterday, quietly mourns

He screams he’s going to need more tax money to fight the fentanyl addiction and more equipment and man power to help with the border

After writing another huge check to Ukraine to help with Zelensky’s non-stop take out order

Accusing all who oppose him as the reasons for his policy futility

His own party is questioning the future of their own grip on power with his continuing downward spiral of electability

The quiet fear is he must start a war to prove himself a decisive top gun

So he can show the world who’s in charge and no one would challenge a second term when he announces his run

Plato said, “The measure of a man is what he does with power”

Biden’s idea of leadership is incorporated in poor decisions, lies, and fleeing to Delaware to hide and cower

0

Hey Kids, It’s Trump Tweet Time

Recently there’s been discussion of letting Donald Trump back on mainstream social media, so it must be election time

Like poking a bear with a sharp stick, the mean tweets will immediately begin, and all opposed to his ideas will be called slime

The left knows this. Trump’s bombastic personality turns a majority of people off. Hence the dementia whisperer currently in the White House

When faced with the choice between the two, a lot of fence sitters consider the situation hopeless as having to select between a red or a blue louse

Therefore sitting on one’s hands and not voting becomes the obvious decision

And a no vote in this Presidential election will be a vote for this current leader of party division

Joe Biden promised to unify the United States. He partially succeeded knowing American citizens are sheep

By jumping in bed with social media, he can gather in most of the flock while Trump plays Little Bo Peep

As most Americans have the attention span of an average housefly, if an inflammatory lie appears on social media, America will retweet

Washington is well aware of this power and will lie, cheat and steal to enforce this deceit

The bottom feeders in the press know to keep it short, simple and seditious

Frame President Applesauce’s thoughts as benevolent and Trumps as racist and malicious

Twist a entire speech into a two sentence hateful statement and send it out through a bot

And if called on the source blame it all on a Russian plot

So it’s time to dust off the mothballs and let Trump rant away

Biden’s handlers are working overtime as America is waking to fact this man sucks and the country is in rapid decay

Give Trump a week and it’s guaranteed the gaseous tweet will be sent in the middle of the night

And the entire social media will be there in force to stoke the fires and old hatred to ignite

0

Posing a Real World Question for ChatGPT

The platform ChatGPT is causing real concern among both parents and educators

It seems this artificial intelligence can answer any question in an accurate way thusly requiring rules and regulators

This platform is a far cry from the dreamy answer appearing in the magic 8 ball or stopping on a Ouija board

It would seem if this new intelligence could provide correct answers, the powers that be could be shoved aside and completely ignored

Why have a group of hapless leaders driven only by personal power and greed when the world’s direction could be easily corrected and is only a mouse click away

Let a neutral computer fueled only by digital zeros and ones solve the pressing issues in government today

The border crisis? Simple. Ukraine needs more money? Here’s the alternative. The New Green Deal? Instead of holding citizens hostage, try this.

After the peals of laughter subsides from the computer’s speakers, the simplicity of the given answers would be easy to dismiss

What would happen to the layers of excess government? The experts, the office toadies, and the influence peddlers

And just maybe those much ballyhooed classified documents would find their way into the shredder

The new party game in Washington would be to watch the current world leaders roll around on the floor trying to tear their hands from each other’s pockets

The special red phone in the government Chiropractor’s office would light up to come put shoulders back their sockets

So, with the nuclear clock currently ten seconds from complete annilation, it’s time to ask one simple question

And put on public display when the computer’s screen lights up with the suggestion

0

When Your Popularity is based on the Price of Eggs

The lowly egg, once vilified as a cholesterol boosting agent is now positioned as the poster child of economic woes

The price of eggs has skyrocketed lately due to various factors that may leave one penniless and the lenders on your property to foreclose

The once cheap source of protein now requires some thought before indulging in your standard breakfast fare

To order that three egg omelet, one must figure that person a millionaire

Perhaps the common egg could now become a form of currency or barter

“Sir that will be 453 eggs to replace that broken starter”

Suddenly the backyard chicken coops become today’s gold mine

The homestead would now the guarded by large snarling dogs and a No Trespassing sign

The homeowner would anxiously wait for cackling hen to announce the arrival of new “cash”

One more egg in the basket to hide in the wall safe along with the rest of the stash

The current administration’s popularity has nose dived recently. Gas prices are bad enough but the price of eggs cannot be blamed on Putin

Shortly when the bored and angry begin to riot, the jewelry and liquor will be left alone and the egg cases in the grocery stores will be the target of looting

When Biden and his gang of thieves decided to give Zelensky a bunch of tanks, maybe the taxpayers, to pay the bill, ought to pony up by the dozen in recyclable cardboard

Since he has bled the average taxpayer dry with his upcharges and hidden taxes, being paid by eggs is all the citizen can afford

Considering a tank costs roughly nine million dollars have the taxpayers ante up 15,517,241 eggs and shells to pay the expense

Let that be payment for escalating an unwinnable conflict and Washington’s lack of commonsense

0

In Search of the Thin Skinned Race

The years of study were reaching completion. The tweed clad professor was leading his class of wide-eyed students in search of a lost civilization.

The professor, wishing he could pull off the fedora and whip look, had to settle for elbow patches and bug repellent for this exploration

This group was searching for an extinct, short lived society that had seemingly vanished over the course of fifty years

These people commonly known as the thin skinned had risen up and then disappeared almost as fast due to trying to survive with their liberal arts careers

The study group was transported to a region formerly known as a large urban area rendered uninhabitable years ago

The thin skinned had once thrived in this environment but fears of climate change and the inevitable loss of the power grid had been the final blow

The professor and his students were out to prove that if they could find just one thin skin trapped beneath the rubble of a Starbucks, through cell regeneration they might revive the species

Suddenly a student shouted in jubilation as an intact cadaver was found in the burnt hull of a hybrid Mitsubishi

The professor knew that much like a mule this particular group of humans had morphed into androgynous creatures

This find was remarkable in that the body displayed an open mouth from both non-stop yelling and crying, exceptionally thin skin, and various colors in the remaining tufts of hair. This find had all the required features

Unable to procreate this race had rapidly died out or relocated to Canada where unrelenting taxes, rules, regulations and a brutal police state had forced them into being cowardly mindless drones

Soon frozen to death in the harsh winters, DNA replication was impossible as there remained only contaminated unusable dust left from the bones

So this find was doubly important as this once living being was found in a fetal position with its arms cradled around what appeared to be a bankers box

As the body was carefully pried away from the box the words Top Secret were on the side and the box seemed to be full of docs

Ignoring protocol, the professor carefully removed the lid hoping his selfish move would not be something he would come to regret

And there in bold letters next to the Top Secret stencil were instructions to store the box in Biden’s garage behind his Corvette

0

An Easy Path To Bipartisanship

Much has been made about the lack of bipartisanship in Congress. The Democrats are too liberal and the Republicans all sit to the right of Genghis Kahn

The ability to achieve anything is accomplished only through threat of government shutdown on a conclusion forgone

The hand wringing is only getting worse as those elected want to control all the balls in their sandbox

Control the box, enrich yourself with pet projects, pork for the large donors, and insider trading upgrading your portfolio of stocks

No one reaches across the aisle, offers a workable solution, or considers the voters

This selfishness has only created chaos at the southern border, the murder of thousands of Ukrainian and Russian soldiers and the blowing of Taps for gasoline motors

However, there exists a pathway to this elusive bipartisanship. It’s simply called shoot a liar

The rules are clear cut. Take any official regardless of party affiliation, caught in a provable lie and throw their name in a rotating bingo cage. Once a year draw a name, stand that person in front of a firing squad and open fire

The day that miscreant is called would be tax day and a homeless vet gets to draw the name

When the person is notified they’re included in the cage they’ll be given a chance to come clean or deny the blame

The name then stays in the cage until their name is drawn, or they “fess up,” resign and disappear

So round and round the cage goes and whose name is drawn nobody knows creating huge Vegas betting odds and loser tears

Once a name is drawn it’s too late. There is no jury trial just a videotape of the proven lie

Then a quick march over to the execution wall as that person chose deceit and greed over truth and its now time to die

Like rats leaving a sinking ship, Washington’s swamp would in no time resemble a ghost town

As both politicians and various influencers climb over each other’s backs before they’re lying at the base of the wall facedown

Those left would strive to work together as America was founded on truth, compromise and individual rights

The day of the lie would be over, Congress would quickly learn to work together and that is what unites

0

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: