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An Observer of Life in Bad Poetry

Commentary on Daily Life, Politics and Sports

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winter weather

A Holiday Adventure at a Charging Station

It was miserably cold and snowing. The battery indicator readout was dangerously low and Granny’s house was still 150 miles away

The digital numbers were ticking near 20% and dropping rapidly on the display

Passing many service stations with high priced gas, the young mother would have gladly paid six dollars a gallon for a full tank and a seven minute stop

The three young kids all strapped in were fussy and the dog probably needed to pee. The past four hours of squinting through the blurry windshield left her ready to drop

Luckily she was able to pull into a vacant government charging station to plug in as she had downloaded the proper app

Perhaps she’d be able to get the three kids into the snack and restroom kiosk and once back in the car they’ll take a nap

The meter was showing it would be approximately 73 minutes to obtain enough charge to make it to Granny’s house

Guilted into this journey so Granny could spend the holidays with the grandkids, the young mother wasn’t real happy with her absent spouse

Now in addition to changing the kids in the family friendly kiosk facility she had to figure a way to walk the dog

Maybe her one break with the wintery weather is that no one would see the dog relieving himself just outside the car door in the snow and fog

“I’m tired of this movie when are we going to get there?’ asked the five year old from the back seat

Squawked another, “I’m hungry and my feet are cold would you please turn up the heat?”

Silently cursing the DC group that killed the oil industry, she now had to keep her group entertained for the same amount of time it would have taken to finish the trip to Granny’s

Maybe they’ll be willing to play “Find the french fry” that might have fallen into one of the nooks and crannies

As a final insult to this frustrating stop, she had to reach into her purse and get a firm grip on the pepper spray she had concealed

And hoping the dog’s frenzied barking would deter the strange looking man currently knocking on the windshield

I Fear No Weather In My New 4X4

 

Finally the moment I’ve been waiting for the wind has picked up and the weather reports forbidding
The roads might go slick with ice and could start cars skidding

The weather forecasters were in agreement, their highly touted high resolution radar does foresee
There’s a chance of sleet, slush or snow if the temperature varies by just a degree

I did what any red blooded male would do when a cold front was moving through
I checked my new SUV for gas and the fridge for an ample supply of cold brew

And to impress the little lady, I pulled around a ladder and swept out the gutters
I also checked the weather seals on the windows and oiled the hinges on the shutters

“I think you’re in overkill,” stated the little lady. “Especially with that big ladder you’ve been dragging.
Besides we shouldn’t have a worry with all the money you spent on that new station wagon.”

“It’s not a station wagon,” I snapped. “Show me a wagon with 355 horsepower and four wheel drive.”
“Whatever,” she countered. “Even without it we have plenty of Spam and would probably survive.”

“But what would happen if a medical emergency happened,” I said. “And someone went into labor?”
With all the eye rolling she could summon replied. “This is a retirement community name someone under 75 who is a neighbor.”

“Ah,” I responded. “You forgot about the mass stampede to the grocery store for milk and bread.”
“Well that would solve our problem,” she grumbled. “You’re lactose intolerant and I’m gluten free. We’d both be dead.”

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