Looking for an appropriate gift this year for your child? Try G I Ze the new action figure

In today’s society one needs to be careful about self identity as gender fluid toys being de rigueur

This new action figure will take all concerns away about disappointment on Christmas morning

And your child can play for hours with the new toy without neighbors’ prying woke eyes issuing a transphobic warning

It’s all about the accessories as you will see this action figure has no gender identity

The neutral doll comes without long hair, breasts or a hooha. A pair of black and white camo shorts is it’s only amenity

For only $29.95 the packaged accessories may be purchased for your child to customize their new toy

This opens up all kinds of opportunities for future gifts for your child to enjoy

From grandma you might drop the hint that the six ink tattoo bundle would be something to increase their artistic ability

The ink is temporary and washable so your offspring can ink Ze according to the social setting demonstrating this toy’s malleability

And for that prissy Aunt Irene, who insists on defining your child by the label on the birth certificate

There’s the debutante package complete with a floor length gown, tiara, white gloves and a tiny book of etiquette

For right wing Uncle Ralph there’s the mercenary package including a canteen, MREs and a semi automatic rifle

Making the action figure a man’s man and to the rest of the neighborhood kids’ action figures very frightful

Should cousin Dave a.k.a. Lil’ Dawg have any money left after cigarettes from his work in the prison license plate shop

There’s the thug package complete with a dark hoodie, hand gun, reflective shades and a streaming stick of profane hip hop

So this year give the complete Christmas gift as long as the rest of the relatives chip in

And you’ll understand how much your gender confused child appreciates your thoughtfulness with the knowing wink and subtle grin