entertainment industry

The New AI Academy Awards

“Okay people listen up,” the newly appointed studio head was calling his meeting to order

We’ve just been handed $28,000 to produce the next blockbuster and we’ve got to stay under budget to afford her

“I need some can’t miss ideas to begin the process of our new AI generated movies”

“The whole process shouldn’t take more than a month for all to contribute to these”

“So write down what you think the public would like and to have them lined up at the box office”

“So I can stand at the podium on awards night and accept the statue on behalf of all of us”

With that the three people stared back from around their laptop screens and wondered if David O. Selznick ever felt this way

This group knew they could create a film with themes from yesterday but be able to sell it to the audiences of today

So the ideas pitched by this group were updated versions of blockbusters from the past

With new computer generated locations, dialogue, and cast

Gone With The Breeze: This time set in Texas near the southern border. The main character Kristi, was an oil rich temptress only interested in what she owns

Her income is derived from cheap housing rented to migrants and her chain of stores providing instant cash for title loans

Omar of America: Living in New York, Omar owns all the garbage pick-ups on the eastside. He also dabbles in child porn and drugs

A home in the Hamptons, he drives Cadillacs and Bentleys instead of rugs

One Flew Over The Looney Nest: This movie would center on a person admitted to the White House requiring constant care

The fake doctor in charge signed all his papers, dictated his letters, and through dealings with his corrupt family made him a multi-millionaire

The Decent The Deplorable and the Repulsive: This film would center on current politicians all looking to be remembered as a game-changer

The Decent would be a brash man quick with his six iron, wearing a trademark red hat as he attempts to ward off danger

The Deplorable is still hanging around offering her opinion as though she still has relevancy

Appearing on numerous talk shows to rail on conservative concepts while ignoring the fact she should be jailed for more than one felony

The Repulsive is a group of ancient lawmakers all having served at the pleasure of themselves

While trying to maintain the air of working for the people, their criminal intent appears when deeper into their background one delves

“But can’t we have a film based on an old feel good movie from the past?” asked the new boss

“We thought about that skipper,” said one of the voices from behind the monitor screen. “But Mary Poppins, The Lion King, and the Trapp family have all been killed by Hamas”

December 3, 2025 0

Plucking The Last Feathers

The work week was over. What was left of your paycheck was deposited after taxes

You’d put in your time, nose to the grindstone, been humiliated by a co-worker, and during the drive home been given the bird by an angry woman in glasses

But the big game was tomorrow and the six pack was cooling under ten pounds of ice

The same ice used on the bag of shrimp you’d found at a very good price

And just when it seemed like the weekend might end on a high note, you scrolled through the messages on your phone

The one that caught your eye was from your TV provider stating the conglomerate owning the sports channels was dropping your provider for reasons unknown

It seems the boys in the boardroom all decided that money alone wasn’t enough, overshadowed by their unquenchable thirst for power

The sports network wanted it all. They’d already taken the gutless conferences hostage with staggered start times now completing the monopoly not caring who they devour

Raise the price charged to the competing provider who were stealing customers by offering better technology and viewing results

And have their own networks talking heads promote their ever spirialing greed while the bill paying customers have to swallow the insults

You’ve been loyal to your own provider and watched as it raised it rates every year

Justified by adding four DIY channels and three more dedicated to alternative lifestyles and the queer

No, you didn’t want the ability to watch NE Montana Technical Institute play women’s volleyball

And you didn’t want to be caught in the middle of the three piece suit boardroom brawl

Life was simple when the game was on one of three channels and was broadcast for free

Now for the price of a monthly utility bill you get a watch a three-hour commercial fest diluted by reviews and one idiot referee

One look at the list of commercials from the wealthiest corporations on the planet

And one might figure the TV providers could broadcast for free, charge these lucrative corporations for the airtime and could still make out like a bandit

But suddenly you are rapidly scrolling for alternative provider plans just to see the game

All you wanted was to kickback for a while but here you sit like a plucked chicken waiting for the flame

November 4, 2025 0

Pssst, I Have The List

The cloaked figure wearing aviator shades crouched low shaded by the doorway nervously checking his surroundings, his eyes shifting from side to side

A hooded shape emerged from behind the dumpster and cautiously approached the figure in a slow crab-like stride

“You got the list?” asked hoodie. “Yeah, I got it” replied Ray Bans

“Let’s see the money,” said the man peering over the top of his frames and holding out his hands

The briefcase snapped open and the minimal light illuminated packs of $100’s stacked neatly in rows

Handing over the thick dossier the sunglass man grabbed the briefcase and into the night he goes

Hoodie stood there shivering even though it wasn’t cold. He knew he had in his possession a list that could bring down CEOs, Hollywood elitists, and many a political heavyweight

With trembling hands he slid out the first sheet and there it was, a list of who was on the flights to sicko island and the date

With blackmail looming large, hoodie headed to the nearest Staples to make copies

It was then he noticed several initials entered multiple times highlighted by yellow sharpies

He now had the power. The highlighted initials could easily be tied to real names

Also in the packet were several videotapes. Each were connected to highlighted initials and those initials were from names everyone blames

“Oh what fun it will be to hear the denials,” hoodie thought

But the more sinister idea was the monetary reward as his silence will have to be bought

“So Mr Muckety Muck, you want that tape of you and the nine year old kept under cover?”

“That’ll be 100 grand for me to suppress that disgusting thing being done to you by your little lover”

“And Mrs X, that film of you and your real partner cutting up that 12-year-old, that’s half a million to you”

“Just remember this is a yearly tax that will be adjusted for inflation. Karma’s a real bitch depending on who you choose to screw”

“These lists and tapes will never see the light of day as they give me a tremendous advantage”

“It’ll be a real chore to keep up with all these high profile names but somehow I’ll have to manage”

But these kind of vile acts couldn’t happen in America. These heinous offenses would immediately lead to long stretches of jail time handed down by impartial judges

That would be the judges who weren’t on the list, abide by the Constitution, and bear no grudges

July 9, 2025 0

The Person Behind The Makeup

“Men go to bed with Gilda and wake up with me,” was famously stated by actress Rita Hayworth

Fantasies abounded with the thoughts of romancing the famous star but the next morning crashing back to earth

In 1949 The Artists League of America voted Rita’s lips best in the world

She signed with Max Factor to promote its line of Tru-Color lipsticks causing women around the world to flip their hair as they twirled

Cosmetics have been used for centuries to enhance beauty and cover flaws

The internet is packed with stories of divorces filed by men viewing their spouse without makeup as the cause

Men have always had to guess what lies behind that foundation, concealer and blush

And what nightmare might emerge from the bathroom the morning after a barroom crush

Ancient Egyptians both women and men used cosmetics for religious purposes, repel insects and show social standing

Though originally used by those connected to royalty, soon the lower caste of people began applying as the use of cosmetics was ever expanding

Recent examples of cosmetics were Twiggy’s eyelashes, Jennifer Garner’s skincare, Brooke Shields’ eyebrows, and Lynda Carter’s lips

Covering flaws and enhancing facial features was as easy as a trip to the mall as a wide array of makeup was at your fingertips

Whole departments in major chain stores are dedicated to cosmetics

To improve a woman’s features that unfortunately were left behind by genetics

Plus the fact the customer usually leaves with a sackful of high-priced colors, sprays, and lotions

All to please the face in the mirror and spark the partner’s emotions

In 2022 the cosmetic industry generated approximately $430 billion in revenue and is on the rise in all categories

As new and improved products are being produced in mega-companies’ laboratories

But as for the males in this ever-changing world and it doesn’t matter what is stated by the law

No amount of concealer is going to hide the fact that you have a hoo-haw

May 7, 2025 0

Snow White Should Have Cursed

Much has been written about Disney’s new movie release Snow White

It seems the star of the show attended the same marketing school as the Bud Light person and neither seem very bright

In an “all about me” moment she trashed the animated classic from 90 years ago and ambushed her more famous co-star with her political views

Making the film a loss in both revenue and putting other Disney projects on the back burner for the cast and production crews

Disney should have taken a hint from Hollywood’s annual preen-a-thon and produced the film with Snow Latino using the f-word

Then the little movie goers elbow deep in their high-priced popcorn could try to get Mom to explain what they just heard

Because this year’s Best Picture Award went to a film about a sex worker that falls in love with a rich guy

A bit of a Pretty Woman re-do with way more sex and the f-word in ample supply

According to reports, the word was used on 479 occasions and with a run time of 139 minutes that’s an f-word twice a minute

The writers figured since the film is about a prostitute, when it came to the f-word the sky’s the limit

Both studios’ probably have reached an all-time low. One screwed up a much beloved classic and the other showcased women as a sex object to be used only for pleasure

Meaning the voters for Oscar thought it was a great idea to award a movie about a foul-mouthed hooker to hand its annual treasure

It doesn’t give women much hope about forming meaningful relationships and building a career

When the best picture awards the lowest common denominator in all women while listening to the alleged pedophiles cheer

Bring them down to their level. Allow men on their teams, in their locker rooms, and cut the genitals off their kids

As movies, television, music, and sports have all hit the skids

A vast wasteland has overwhelmed this country in the name of multimedia progressive shift

And this movement has been shoved in all’s face and it has been swift

From Lucy Ricardo sleeping in twin beds to the sex worker in the current best picture

It’s a short lifetime from black and white entertainment to having the gutter mentality crammed down people’s throats only to keep the boardroom richer

April 8, 2025 0

Kamala’s Krazy Kharacters

Hey Kids! What time is it?! It’s time again for the Kamala Show featuring her cast of crazy puppets

Just remember kids, these puppets all say the same thing, so they sure aren’t the Muppets

Kamala decided this is the best way to win the election. Let her puppets do her talking in their own lingo and she can hide from the press. Obviously an understudy of the demented one for the last four years

He wrote the democratic handbook on how to campaign. Come out of hiding, make a creepy, whispery, angry statement, then walk away while the world watches as he disappears

Because she can’t copy this blueprint exactly she decided to hide off-stage and let her puppets do the talking

That way she can continue to say nothing, take no questions, and not look like the dead man walking

Frieda the fry girl opens the show complete in the McDonald’s uniform with a hairnet smelling slightly like an eight dollar Big Mac

Asking a customer what kind of middle class burger they would like to fill up the sack

Next up is Mike the roughneck fracking puppet. Dressed in tough guy working clothes he praises Kamala for keeping fracking and bread on the table

What Mike doesn’t know is Kamala won’t sign the leases to permit fracking as soon as she is able

Coming on stage now is Sista Latrese, one of the black puppets Kamala takes for granted. “Of course we be voting for Kamala, cause we be part of the women of color club”

“We’re the future the democrats have been promising for 100 years and because democrats would never lie we’ll be learning to wash our greens in our middle class tub”

Hitting the stage next and keeping a wary eye out for ICE because she has no green card, is Juanita the Latin housekeeper.

Employed in a middle class home, Juanita is tired of changing linens and diapers but is grateful for the job she obtained because she works cheaper

“Still waiting on that free house,” screams Angelo the migrant Haitian puppet. “All we got now is hotel rooms, free phones and food, We demand middle class!”

Kids remember it was only six weeks ago Angelo was living in homeland squalor in a tin hut with a roof of grass

See how far Angelo’s come just by crossing the border and living off the goodness of the Red Cross and Catholic Charities

Just ignore the fact that empires have failed for centuries because of invasions, bad economies, and political divisions. History is a giant circle just look at the Roman Empire similarities

And to close out the the show is our favorite rapper Fat Slo Mo whose song We be freakin’ to the middle class is number one on the charts

With the lyrics “da bitches and da hoes better bring the goods,” we appreciate all the wisdom the song imparts

Hopefully Kamala doesn’t consider herself a hoe and the lyric is from a spurned rapper and just sour grapes

But both are hoping they don’t turn up in compromising positions on Diddy’s sex tapes

So kids come and spend an afternoon with Kamala and her friends

She won’t answer any questions and will stay quiet and not look stupid before to the White House she ascends

September 23, 2024 0

We’re Gonna Need You One More Time

It’s been four years since we last spoke, my how time does fly

We all hope you’re doing well but we do have one request before we say goodbye

You see we’re going to need you to vote for us when you can

Remember we’re the party that is running a woman of color against an old white man

And its because of her we’re only gonna need you one more time

Because now she is promising a better economy, a secure border, and to be tough on crime

Ignore the fact that because of her administration that you are struggling to make ends meet, fill your car, put food on the table, and gunshots that keep you awake at night

Keep in mind that its all Trump’s fault and continue to hate everything white

That hopeless feeling that hits you every morning is just a normal reaction

Living slightly below paycheck to paycheck, we’ll wave fictitious reparations under your nose as a distraction

We’re going to ask you to tap dance one more time down to the ballot box

While you step toe over the junkies, the pushers, and hostile migrants that have taken over your blocks

Because in four more years we won’t need your vote as the 10 million new citizens will all be voting for us

Meaning in reality you’ll be sitting further back in the bus

We’re already moving them into your cities to take over your neighborhood

Foreign language signs will now be viewed where your uncle’s store of fifty years had stood

But don’t worry about that, like a largemouth bass seeing a shiny new lure, we’re going to reel you in

We’re going to ignore the real issues and make this election about gender and the color of your skin

We’re gonna make up some facts, call them true, try to arrest our opponent, and glorify our candidate

Oh yeah, we’ll get some celebrities and rap stars to appear on stage and say we’re great

So because your relatives before you blindly voted for us and because to their old beliefs they cling

We’re asking you to vote for the woman who washes her greens in her tub and has a Tobasco flavored bathtub ring

September 2, 2024 0

Going For The Gold

As the Olympics are winding down there are some medals that may have been overlooked

It seems Paris needed to create some new medals for all the squatters and immigrants the city ran out of the area because they were overbooked

So the city fashioned a medal for each of the unfortunates to treasure while they were forced to live on the streets

And made sure the cameras didn’t see them, ruining the view from the visiting elites

There was also a new medal for the fastest assembly of the new cardboard beds

The gold would go to the athlete with the best time combined with the best use of the Olympic themed spreads

Most of the Olympic Village guests were disqualified as they used the spread for a window covering since there were no curtains offering no time for privacy and solitude

Giving the athletes scarcely any alone time to adjust their game-time attitude

There was also a little known medal called the cafeteria race given to the winner in the form of the lone piece of meat

It seems the person in charge of food service figured the participants existed on brocolli and bean sprouts as the only fuel needed to compete

Finally, the last unknown medal was handed to marathoners who braved the waters of the river Seine

These medals were for bravery as the questionable water quality was checked daily for e-coli so the swimmers didn’t spend three days shooting antibiotics doubled up in pain

There were plenty of highlights from the games. The opening ceremony featured a woke version of the Last Supper painting

The depiction horrified a lot of America and had little old ladies fainting

The women’s gymnastics team dubbed the Golden Girls summoned up the gold led by Simone Biles

All activity stops while she is on the floor, the routine finishes, she sticks the landing and smiles

At the Olympics in 2052 the crowd will cheer when Katie Ledecky uses a rollator to get to her starting blocks

And then swims to four more medals while she blows her competitors out of their socks

When the US mens gymnastic team needed a flawless performance to medal they called on Stephen Nedoroscik

Putting down his glasses and hopping on the pommel horse with a perfect routine scoring high enough to do the trick

Other highlights include the Turkish air pistol shooter winning silver looking like he just stepped out of the audience and said “hold my beer”

Anthony Ammirati from France giving a new meaning to the term pole vault showing that except for a suddenly conspicuous bulge he might have been able to clear

And so it goes an evening of tape delay video filled with commercials that in no way will enhance your fitness

But as the champions emerge you can sit in your easy chair and claim to be a virtual witness

August 7, 2024 0

Nickel and Dimeing Your TV Viewing to the Poorhouse

Back in the day television was a simple thing. Three channels of black and white delivered to you by a glorified lightning rod or rabbit ears with tin foil bowties

Then color TV happened with a phrase of “brought to you in living color” with the image of peacock plumage, a true feast for the eyes

One day Ted Turner decided there was more to life than billboard advertising and bought a small UHF station and bounced the signal off satellite and television viewing was never the same

One could forego Bonanza or Lucy and watch roller derby, wrestling, old movies, or a Braves game

So the network owners invested in large satellite dishes and doled out the sudden influx of available programs and channels through their own cable organization

Soon the antennae the viewer used was outdated and that viewer was pressured to purchase cable “packages” that included uncut first run movies and non-stop sports plus all the trumped-up local charges added that usually offered no explanation

Crystal clear viewing touted by the cable companies (if the weather wasn’t storming) came with a price

The basic $32.99 package usually came with your local network affiliates, a couple of home shopping networks, a Christian station, and could be used only with a single device

You want the Movies? Add an extra $4.99. A sports package showing the major sports? Another $6.99. First run original shows? Again another $4.99. Or you can bundle them all for $16.99. And with this bundle you can now view the shows in two different rooms

The network executives fueled by their own greed quickly realized the more bait that’s dangled the more the viewer consumes

But cable and the satellite networks both had their problems. Cable required miles of wire and a fleet of service people. The satellite networks required service and careful placement of the dish. And still a summer thunderstorm could knock out both

Many times the beer was cold, the friends were there, it was game time, when a crack of lightning turned the TV screen off accompanied by choruses of a four letter oath

And then came the streaming services. Eureka, now the greed mongers could send their signal through the consumers’ own equipment and charge the suckers for their programming only without the fleet of service employees

And different programming can be selected by viewers and those selections can be funneled to advertisers in those cities

And much like cable, different levels of programming can still apply. Only now for different networks they can have their own upcharges. What’s another $2.95 per channel for uninterrupted viewing

It won’t be long before the monthly bill with all the fine print shows up for $175 with all the charges you’ve been accruing

And the golden goose of sports honks loudest of all. You want Thursday night NFL? Invest in a Prime Membership. NFL in Europe? Another upcharge. College game on ESPN 3? Invest you turkey. Wildcard game on Peacock? Give till it hurts

And when they’re lowering your casket into that cold ground as the family stands by in silence wondering where their next meal will come from. Just remember they’ll be thinking of the small fortune squandered to a group of greedy broadcasting perverts

January 13, 2024 7

NFL-Now For Losers

The final whistle has blown. Another afternoon of boredom had finished with a game winning field goal in a thrilling 15-12 dog fight

For sixty minutes the product that was the NFL had arm tackled, slid, challenged, reviewed, and penalized their way through another contest that failed to excite

Oh, sure the hard core and somewhat nostalgic fans had dressed up, painted their faces and shouted their lungs out

But in all truthfulness there were harder hits in the beer line at the concession stand between a loudmouth in the opponents jersey and a home team drunken lout

Of course this wasn’t seen on the dreary television broadcast. Viewers only see a guy with an annoying monotone and an ex-jock who talks like he’s taken one too many blows to the head

Not knowing when to shut up and hopefully wowing his viewing audience with football terms like a-gap, mike linebacker, and the spread

We’re all impressed with your knowledge and attempt to make a team seem relevant when the last five possessions resulted in 3 punts, a fumble and a field goal

Completely waxing over the fact the quarterback play was abysmal, tackling was nonexistent, and the star safety is now out on parole

There will be no nostalgic memories of this generation’s games. No Immaculate Reception, the Catch, or the Ice Bowl

Just a group of money hungry executives with a poor product selling you on London games, Thursday night boredom, and a game with no soul

Pro football has become a marketing tool for the Uber-rich owners and the advertisers that line their pocket books

They’ll play to the current media fad. They’ll kneel for the National Anthem, place Love stickers on the helmets, charge $14 for a beer endorsed by a transgender and not care how it looks

There’s a review after every catch, every touchdown and every out of bounds play

The five minutes spent looking at the play from every angle are spent by blasting gambling, delivery pizza, and car commercials to the viewers that shelled out big bucks to watch this pathetic display

The Purple People Eaters today would all be suspended and the Steel Curtain would be on report in the commisioner’s office for their attacking style of defense

The play today consists of the line of scrimmage forced to play patty cake and the secondary giving the receiver every advantage as some idiot fan proudly displays a D and a picket fence

While a buff female sideline judge, who couldn’t quite hack the cheerleading squad, determines if an offensive player stepped on the sidelines

Who will then huddle with the rest of the steroid enriched officiating crew to determine if a penalty review is warranted to which the opposing coach declines

There’s now obvious holding on every play, tackling is a forgotten art and running backs run with their head down looking for a soft place to land

Quarterbacks slide if breathed upon, opposition players flop like caught mackerels on late drives when timeouts are scarce, and the team seemingly can’t comprehend the plays on their wristband

The game has become wearisome. A once violent game whose now show of force is the woke classroom training of what’s permissible and what is disbarred

Reduced now to this year’s biggest NFL story of a pop star dating a left guard

October 20, 2023 0

Why has the NFL become so Lame?

For the last ten weeks the talking heads have babbled on about which team would reach the playoffs

Six or seven old players and coaches assembled every Sunday morning to analyze the matchups and to every statement made another commentator scoffs

As if the world depended on whether a 6-8 team has a chance and what things have to happen for this to fall right

Maybe their expertise allows them to realize most games scheduled are potential stinkers and to stir controversy will get the viewers to tune in tonight

Finally, after long season of increasingly bad officiating and very mediocre coaching schemes, the playoffs were decided

The season’s games had been filled with multiple three and outs, over the hill quarterbacks, and coaches that couldn’t win with what the front office provided

So the wildcard weekend kicked off to separate the have nots from the truly inept

The games showed the glaring deficiencies in several teams, players, and owners as the season long pretenders weren’t going to win no matter how much they prepped

“Ah,” said the talking heads. “Now comes the real show. The cream always rises”

“No more of the teams that lived off the luck of strange time zone scheduling and questionable call surprises”

The combined power of the talking heads spent hours assuring viewers the upcoming games would be truly epic

To reinforce the idea the networks ran old clips of previous playoff spectacular moments to convince the most jaded skeptic

Eight teams were left, the best of the best. The fans filled the stadiums and viewers arranged their day around the broadcast

In the end four teams remained from the divisional round in which for five of these super teams’ offenses, a score of twenty points was not surpassed

Were the defenses that good played by chest pounding potential free agent multi-millionaires?

The truth is, no one over forty would ever confuse today’s product with the Steel Curtain or Da Bears

Throw in multiple official reviews when everyone watching knew if the original call was correct, five minute commercial breaks, and inane patter from the broadcast team

And the most suspense in one very boring contest was, due to kicking woes, would the coach change horses in midstream

The Championship games will be played with the three top quarterbacks in the league while the rest of the teams will have the offseason to wallow in their futility

As the pompous team owners scream they’ll be back while suffering from illusions of grandeur and advancing senility

January 23, 2023 0

A Movie, A Concession Stand, and a Brinks Truck

The weather forecast once again was calling for no relief from the current heat wave

And the local Bijou is showing the summer blockbuster movie featuring a star who’s always been a fave

The film had been released four weeks ago so the lines to get in have dwindled

Figuring we could catch the first showing at reduced ticket prices, we wouldn’t feel swindled

So to speed up the ticket process we decided to purchase on-line, so we could breeze right in to our seat

Swallowing hard when the ticket prices showed up in the click to buy box the afternoon reduced price was way more when it was printed on the receipt

Checking back on the fine print, the amount charged was an add-on for a processing and handling fee

It seems a surcharge of four fifty was considered a small price to pay to get into a movie hassle-free

But this was early afternoon and an escape from the heat with an enjoyable film seemed like winner

Slowly advancing to the pick up ticket window as the the old folks shuffle was in full swing, they too were figuring on a movie and an early bird dinner

So we took our place behind three blue-hairs who spent the next ten minutes looking through old Kleenexes, pill boxes, and breath mints for exact change

While the seductive smell of fresh popcorn wafted over everyone standing downrange

It was at this point where we realized a Brinks truck was necessary if we needed popcorn and a drink to enjoy the showing

The best value deal on the menu board consisted of a reusable five gallon bucket of popcorn and a half gallon of soda to keep the type II diabetes growing and the bladder flowing

All for $49.95 with free refills and if one brings the bucket back to a future showing your popcorn will only be two bucks

So a lesson was learned, it would be cheaper to have a early lunch at a four star restaurant before the movie and you won’t have to buy your snacks with sacks of money protected by armed guards from the Brinks trucks

July 19, 2022 0

Mickey Has Lost His Dickey

Walt was a cartoonist with a vision. He created Minnie as a life long partner to be in love with Mickey

But that was years ago. Now the employees of this empire feel empowered to tell parents how to raise their children hiding behind camouflage of everything Disney and that is really sickey

Recently the taped greeting at The Magic Kingdom has been changed from welcoming boys and girls to just welcoming friends

It seems that in the true sense of the words, boys and girls are now passe’ and the neutral gender world now transcends

Fearful that excited starry eyed kids looking for the Disney experience might just have their entire vacation ruined by being referred to as a girl or a boy

The idea that a child might enjoy being a kid without input from a woke adult is a concept Disney is out to destroy

Always keep in mind that Disney sings the praises of a genderless world so all people can live in the bubble of angry gender neutrality

All the while hiding behind costumes of smiling characters in the hypocritical name of congeniality

Florida recently passed a law stating that educators cannot discuss gender identity with kids aged five to eight.

Still struggling with primary reading and writing, kindergarten through third grade doesn’t seem like a reach before teaching a kid their own identity to hate

But Disney employees reacted like the end of the world was near, as they alone should have control of a child’s id

Get ’em while they’re young, thoroughly confuse the tykes, force feed them identity politics through entertainment venues and before long turn out another confused and frustrated kid

Looks like Mickey is going to have to dump Minnie as heterosexual relationships are now frowned upon

The Disney employees might consider themselves warriors for a just cause but in the case of the bottom line that conclusion is not forgone

Biting the hand that feeds them isn’t a solid policy when the turnstiles slow and the crowds begin to thin

The color green is what drives this business and in spite of a very self-serving attitude, let the profits plummet and this is another cause the left might just not win

April 1, 2022 0

Same Song Stranger Times

Though these songs recorded years ago have withstood the test of time

A pandemic of epic proportion can change the meaning of the title on a dime

These songs weren’t written with a global virus in mind

But the title and today’s current conditions can now become entwined

When Ol’ Blue Eyes sang about “Strangers In The Night”

He wasn’t singing about masked neighbors keeping their distance on a sidewalk to be polite

And George The Possum Jones’ country hit “All My Friends Are Strangers”

He wasn’t advising that human contact could be a danger

Social distancing with Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton has come into play

”Distant Strangers” is now sound advice to not become virus prey

Social media is helpful in this abruptly perilous time

Barbara Lewis’ “Hello Stranger” is a greeting to combat any closeness crime

“Company Of Strangers” by Bad Company could be appropriate for the left coast

As California released prisoners to roam the streets looking for someone to be their host

Most of the American public can agree on “Strangers In A Strange Land” by Leon Russell

As the streets are empty, restaurants closed and no sound of city noise and bustle

Finally Billy Joel released The Stranger his critically acclaimed record

Because we Americans are suddenly strangers the album title strikes a dismal chord

Also included in the disc is the sadly prophetic track “Only The Good Die Young”

Unfortunately in today’s world this could become a funeral dirge by the way it’s sung

April 1, 2020 0

Meghan’s Tupperware Party

Welcome to my house, my name is Meghan and I’m new to this neighborhood

I thought this Tupperware party might be a good way to meet everyone like a new resident should

I appreciate y’all parking around the U-Haul trailer and stepping over the string attached to the garden hose post

As the queen of this new house, today I’ll be serving as your host

We’re a small family and are really trying to adjust to the area

We yearn to live the quiet life away from all the hysteria

So please make yourself as comfortable as you can. The furniture just arrived from No Credit Rental

As soon as we can swing it, I’ll bring in newer furnishings so please don’t be too judgmental

I hope you brought your check book because I have some exciting items to show you

They’ll make your life easier in a lot of every day tasks you need to do

The first piece I’d like to show you is this heart shaped baking dish I use for Harry’s kidney pie

Presenting your partner with heart shaped food might just turn you into his “special” pie in the sky

Next I’d like to show you this handy divided dish that Harry uses for his fish and chips

Since his new job is an Uber driver, he has to eat on the run to not miss any tips

Finally I’d like to show this wonderful new casserole pan perfect for my recipe of bubble and squeak

I think my secret ingredients make it better, and there’s no in law here to critique

So feel free to look my samples over and thumb through the handy fliers

Hopefully that should turn you into happy neighbors and satisfied buyers

And as you leave, I’ll ask you again to be careful stepping over the string attached to the post for the garden hose

It leads all the way to Harry and is tied to the ring I have in his nose

January 23, 2020 4

Did Hollywood Sanction White Privilege

Growing up in the fifties movies and television influenced impressionable minds

The images flickering across the screens produced ties that binds

Before Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, television was that era’s social media

If information was needed a phone wasn’t in play just the cumbersome encyclopedia

The politically correct industry has preached emphatically about white entitlement

The media railed against this unthinking concession with vile resentment

Social media, aspiring candidates, and celebrities decry this birthright

However, these same groups promoted this concept to keep all things white

As kids we sat in front of the black and white console clad in our Mickey Mouse ears

And watched the white t-shirted white kids sing and dance as Mousketeers

The whiteness of this group wasn’t an issue as we kids were all fans

However the brightness coming through the picture tube made us all wish for Ray Bans

Cartoon characters drawn in black were sassy cats, crows, or an agitated duck

If you were looking for a black role model you were out of luck

Amos and Andy, Tarzan’s natives and Our Gang’s Little Rascals with Buckwheat

Were stereotyped caricatures and all part of Hollywood’s quiet deceit

The entertainment industry grew a conscience after discovering a third color of green

It just may not be pure poison to show a person of color on the silver screen

American Bandstand showed bands playing both pop music and soul tunes

One realized all people could enjoy music and dance on Saturday afternoons

Weekly shows demonstrated that blacks and whites could interact

Networks added black people cast in recurring roles that had an impact

Star Trek’s Uhura, Mannix’s Peggy, and Julia all had starring roles

Give Mission Impossible’s Barney wire and a battery, he could sabotage bad guys’ controls

The pre-cable/satellite network industry flourished in the next couple of decades

However detective shows and wealthy elite sagas were best viewed through shades

Shows of color seemed to morph into thirty minute comedies of kids cracking wise

Creating a real life classroom situation that teachers grew to despise

Finally networks and movies began to show leadership roles in a different light

Corporate boardrooms seeing a depleting viewership realized all stars need not be white

Diversity became the collective buzzword to keep their investors in tow

One wouldn’t want any bad publicity leaking to the press to damage their profitable show

Politically correct agendas were trumpeted by those stepping from around the corner

Award shows became bully pulpits for high profile celebrities ranting in mock horror

Public Broadcasting lectured all with a haughty attitude preening for their pretentious fans

While watching the British comedies, Downton Abbey and Poldark through their Ray Bans

November 4, 2018 2

Want Ad Translator

It was Sunday, the paper’s heavy and the Classified section thick

Bills are due, employment was needed and not a lot of room to cherry pick

Some new employment want ads might be a possible opportunity

A new posting even shows a job hiring in a nearby community

Closer inspection reveals the job description might need translation

Years of experience helped peruse the ads to avoid future frustration

Certain phrases hoist the red flags and should be discussed during the interview

Notices always promises stability, excellent conditions and part of a progressive crew

However what is written and real life might be the difference of night and day

A quick look at some of the phrases might eliminate frustration and paycheck dismay

Fast Paced Environment: Meaning you’re in over your head from day one

As we have no training program you’ll work slavishly until deciding cut and run

Must be Flexible: We are short staffed, our place is a mess, you’d better be good with a broom

Oh and three days a week, be early as you’ll be mopping and scrubbing the restroom

Must be accurate: Pay attention to every detail, have positive attitude, and be highly organized

Our manager is a nit picker, tattles to the boss for minor infractions, so you will be scrutinized

Huge Opportunity for Growth: We’re broke and have only twenty four dollars in our bank account

An immediate need for you to land three huge clients within the week would be paramount

Must be a Team Player and able to Multitask: We are undisciplined and have no faith in our current staff

You’ll fill in when a deadbeat doesn’t show up, you’ll do his job and yours, but first you need a polygraph

Salary Commensurate with Experience: This phrase means we’re not planning on paying the new employee squat

You better be willing to work long hours for the minimum, if expecting more wear clothes that make you look hot.

Years of want ad followup has led me to these conclusions, the job just might not be as the ad appears

So I’ll tell the unemployment lady I’m still out looking and have myself a few more beers.

November 1, 2017 0

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