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A Daily Observer in Bad Poetry

Humor in Daily Life, Politics and Sports

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political

Views From The Basement

The voice from the basement came through loud and clear
His speeches had been rehearsed and edited so on his video he’s normal it appears

But all around him his handlers seemed concerned about his next big gaffe
Causing his detractors to enjoy the moment and all have a big laugh

The virus happening at this point in time for the Democrats is very fortuitous
Hoping the stay at home orders are in place through November frustrating Americans and him being victorious

America’s buoyant economy and the man in charge were dealt a very lousy hand
The Dems in their perfect 20/20 hindsight state how prepared they’d have been to take command

Perhaps they could use as an example their highly successful cash for clunkers incentive
But one will never hear that from the media as that might prove insensitive

Viewing from his cellar through his periscope he wants to make 11 million undocumented people citizens
Guaranteeing the leftists stay in power for the foreseeable future supporting the New World Order visions

Taxes would be raised exponentially to support these new people as most small businesses were shuttered due to state mandates
The new poor would have to rely on the government for subsistence, all part of the devious plan of the candidate

When a vaccine is developed there will be orders issued to implant proof of procedure chips in all residents
Without regard to peoples’ privacy, to keep citizens under Big Brother’s thumb will become the new precedent.

So the dems are prepping a angry woman to assume the reins when the newly elected man is sent to Shady Acres Rest Home
Already rejected once by her own party she’ll show the world who’s in charge with an intense leftist retaliation syndrome

All this can be seen by the presidential candidate peering into the shaken world through his periscope
Using his impeccable hindsight to continually push his anti capitalistic taxation heavy envelope

This Time it won’t be Col. Mustard in the Library with a Candlestick

As America peers over its’ masks and tries to get back to business as usual
And the states and the US government argue over what is constitutional

The tired poor huddled masses are trying to determine what is safe and what is not
Should they stay at home or venture out and give the new world a shot

There are virtually no clues as to where the virus is lurking and where it is attached
The knowledge feverishly supplied by the current crop of experts demonstrates the surface has barely been scratched

You’ve used the drive thru at the fast food restaurant and so far so good
The food came home was removed from the packaging and everyone washed their hands as they should

Since no one is showing any symptoms maybe a trip to the gym is in order to burn off the quarantine pounds
The belt is out a couple of notches and the chip bags are empty so exercise could be as good as it sounds

Hopefully the person wiping down the equipment didn’t miss a spot with the disinfectant wipes
It would be easy to miss a small section while the attendant’s attention wanders as he swipes

America will probably have to live through a period of mental disorder
For instance staring and wondering at the masked and gloved waiters as they take your order

The virus could be anywhere and then again it might not be around
“Are you feeling lucky punk?” Quoting Dirty Harry just to spend a night on the town

The clues this time won’t be easy but rest assured it won’t be Mrs Peacock, Miss Scarlett or Professor Plum.
The virus might have originated on the ATM from an infected card reader that brushed your thumb

Or it might have come from the church lady who felt obligated to help even though she didn’t feel right
And rather than question her unsteadiness you worked along side to be polite

Or maybe it was Sam the butcher handing your change back while wrapping the two pounds of mutton
So instead of the game of Clue maybe we should be playing button, button whose got the button

For certain until the all clear whistle is blown we can make rules for the guessing game of Covid-19
At least until someone develops a safe effective and inexpensive vaccine

Gone with the Wave of a Wand

IMG_1120Keeping up with the Jones’ in the well heeled neighborhood was easy not so long ago

Money was blown that hadn’t yet been earned but borrowing and terms were easy so you could owe

Critical items were needed like ten dollar coffee stops and hair and nails done by appointment

Knowing you had to put off the new phone because the note was due on the luxury SUV was a disappointment

But there was food in the fridge and eating out three times a week seemed like money well spent

Still at the end of the month after all was paid you wonder where it all went

Then came the pandemic a disease that was supposed to happen in other countries but not here

Yet local businesses closed, the income flow ceased peeling away the comfortable veneer

Formally sociable people turned common sense into panic and panic into hoarders

The media and government had every citizen contagious and to slow the spread closed the borders

An ugly realization that bills were still due, the ATM show zero balance and credit cards were maxed

Hoping like crazy the mortgage company’s late fee policy would be relaxed

The news reporters were showing the daily casualty numbers and stores’ empty shelves

All advising the merits of staying at home while broadcasting remotely themselves

The pantry and refrigerator are now empty and the family just finished the last box of cereal

Suddenly poor and humble, the humiliation of asking for assistance seemed immaterial

With hair tucked under a scarf and chipped nails you inch along in the the food line watching the gas gauge point to low

Wishing you’d had fewer dinner parties with thirty dollar bottles of Merlot

This can’t be happening in America, it’s a birthright ticket to easy street

Not sitting in a sweltering line of cars hoping for a box of food so the family will be able to eat

Same Song Stranger Times

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Though these songs recorded years ago have withstood the test of time

A pandemic of epic proportion can change the meaning of the title on a dime

These songs weren’t written with a global virus in mind

But the title and today’s current conditions can now become entwined

When Ol’ Blue Eyes sang about “Strangers In The Night”

He wasn’t singing about masked neighbors keeping their distance on a sidewalk to be polite

And George The Possum Jones’ country hit “All My Friends Are Strangers”

He wasn’t advising that human contact could be a danger

Social distancing with Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton has come into play

”Distant Strangers” is now sound advice to not become virus prey

Social media is helpful in this abruptly perilous time

Barbara Lewis’ “Hello Stranger” is a greeting to combat any closeness crime

“Company Of Strangers” by Bad Company could be appropriate for the left coast

As California released prisoners to roam the streets looking for someone to be their host

Most of the American public can agree on “Strangers In A Strange Land” by Leon Russell

As the streets are empty, restaurants closed and no sound of city noise and bustle

Finally Billy Joel released The Stranger his critically acclaimed record

Because we Americans are suddenly strangers the album title strikes a dismal chord

Also included in the disc is the sadly prophetic track “Only The Good Die Young”

Unfortunately in today’s world this could become a funeral dirge by the way it’s sung

Bernie Gets Part Of His Wishes For Only $2000000000000.00

The election is still eight months away and not a vote has been cast
Against Mr. Biden, Bernie’s just hanging on trying to outlast

But this nasty virus has with Bernie become a strange bedfellow
The Dems added pork to their package and turned the Republicans back bone to jello

The virus reached pandemic level on both coasts so Congress passed a bill to fight this plague
But the alleged goal of the stimulus package by both parties became a bit vague

Mr. Sanders has been adamant in free healthcare for all and the bill provides free testing
Next will be free treatment and that will be approved with no protesting

Because this is an election year the Democrats are striking while the virus is hot
With 75 million to the National Endowment For The Arts, someone hit the jackpot

To raise that much money PBS would have to sell a lot of Downton Abbey DVD’s
Hopefully there won’t be a lot of fund raising while the shut ins are fighting for their life from this disease

Bernie’s hatred of the wall received a positive update, 350 million for refugee resettlement
That’s good news for Mr. Sander’s borderless country and should aid in his contentment

There’s nothing like adding many new unskilled people to counties’ welfare rolls
But they’ll vote democrat and with Nancy’s idea of no ID for voting the dems will sweep the polls

The new refugees I’m sure are going to be a big help in righting the economy and fighting this virus
While the leaders of Congress can proudly say we passed this bill with out bias

Bernie should be down right gleeful about the US having to pay it’s citizens
Dependency on the government are all part of his far left visions

The money won’t be enough people living week to week will still be broke
It’s only a matter of time before another bill will be in front of Congress for them to invoke

America will sell it’s ideals and soul to try to right it’s economy with another stimulus bill
While the Chinese continue to eat their bats and perhaps morph the virus into one that can really kill

So Mr. Sanders stays in isolation but still gets some of his wishes granted without making a speech
Again the virus worked in his favor as Biden stumbles people don’t have to listen to Bernie preach

Time For A Reboot

As usual after countless attempts the help desk 24/7 phone line was still busy
The reports were due and the management staff was in a tizzy

Finally after losing precious minutes the monotone IT expert came on the line
The system kept locking on the merge screen as if by design

Hopefully this personality rich individual could figure the cause
Always under the notion the systems are perfect and the operator has flaws

Demeaning himself to speak to us peons his first suggestion was to reboot
Like explaining to a toddler he advised to locate the power switch, toggle, and you should compute

If only the world was so simple that one could flip the power switch
Just reach behind the box, a quick push and goodbye to the glitch

As in system software like this world this isn’t always the case
There is no reset button as this virus disrupts the human race

A new set of rules has been hastily written and thrust on mankind
Daily routines, employment and relationships as we know it have been redefined

Granny is off limits, one can only work from home and little kids watch the outdoors through the window sills
While an anxious mother watches terrified that either she or they will start to have the chills

Also knowing she’ll have to explain the monster’s not under the bed but on their playmate’s hands
Hoping beyond belief there is some comprehension and the little one understands

When this vile plague is over perhaps a reboot is what this country needs
A time to look back and not stumble over the same misdeeds

Time to see the puppy’s delighted wiggle, the infant’s reach, the elder’s smile because you walked in the door
Forgiving the cry in the night, a minute of forgetfulness, or the accident on the floor

To continue dwelling in the negatives of the past only wounds the heart
Moreover thinking there is only one resolution that matters the world will continue to drift apart

The Old Man Democrat Rap

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Hello Folks and welcome to the first democratic rap off

But safety first people use elbow bumps to greet and masks if you cough

Our contestants tonight are Lil Havana Bernie and Wooden Nickels Joe

We think by the time this evening is through you’ll be treated to quite the show

By using the best of three coin toss to make sure Wooden Nickels went last Lil Havana will go first

And since Donna Brazile is not backstage this rap is completely unrehearsed

We would ask the audience to refrain from heckling and may the best rapper win

So now with no further delay Lil Havana you may begin

Skritcha skritcha skritcha

“Yo peeps listen here I be here again

We gonna take down CEO’s and rich oilmen

And when those rich whiteys are gone

You gonna know which side of da toast da butter be on

Your healthcare and college be free and we be tearing down da wall

Socialism is king and capitalism will fall

All will be treated alike citizens or not

Everyone gonna get three squares and a cot

Castro da man made Kooba a better place

By following my hero we can shove our govment in Trump’s fat face

So dat’s my rap, Reverend Jackson is on my side to capcha his brothas’ vote

And come November we can all stand with raised fists and gloat

So come out and vote for me to give me da inside track

I mean this as I be serious as a heart attack”

Boom cha cha Boom cha cha

“My name is Biden and I be running for prez in a big way

I can’t member nuttin or so dey say

I be like one of the Royal family with da ol lady Queen

I feel like Prince Charles and should be making the scene

Me and Brotha Obama once be tight

And if he’d endorse me the future be bright

If he don’t I be draggin out da heavy artillery

I be naming my running mate as Hilary

In no time flat she be committing me to da rubber room

So her delayed Presidency she can resume

We gonna take your guns but don’t be alarmed

Our new gangsta immigrants will see no one’s harmed

Also we be gonna oh crap I forgot this verse

I can’t remember like I usta and my thoughts go from bad to worse

So instead of rapping I be striking a pose and do a dab

And I’ll fondle my crotch if someone be telling which side of my Depends to grab

I grabbed the wrong side in Cleveland

And the scramble for the exits got out of hand

So vote for me in November as I be da man to beat

And in November we can hand those Democ…er Republicans a defeat”

Books That Have Been Banned…Revisited

Books have been burned and banned through the ages
By people who feel they have a right to censor what is written on the pages

What follows are three books that were banned before Al Gore’s internet was invented
And before his wife’s blacklist of the music she found offensive should be prevented

The Grapes of Wrath

Published in 1939 Steinbeck’s novel describes the struggles of a destitute farming family for survival
Driven from Oklahoma by the crop killing dust storms the kinfolk load their meager possessions and head to California hoping for a better life on arrival

The hand bills posted promised a finer life with improved living conditions and plentiful jobs
The harsh reality after a brutal travel west the family and all like them were set upon by government mobs

Beaten and hounded, the destitute group found no solution to their trouble
Called Reds by the authorities fearing the spread of socialism, the families were forced to live in tents and burned out rubble

Fast forward 80 years and immigration caravans are marching to California only to find the Welcome sign had been removed
Though many managed to sneak in most found misery and their life not improved

The fear of socialism remains high as these new immigrants will surely vote for those promising all things free
Forcing America to lean to the left will then become a certainty

1984

Published in 1949 Orwell’s book was about the spread of communism forced on it’s citizens and businesses by the government or Big Brother
The countries’ people were regulated by telescreens in every room or approved media as the government spied on one another

The protagonist Winston Smith worked for the government as a fact changer
He changed data according to the government’s whims, and if not his life was in danger

In real time 1984 the McIntosh PC was introduced in a Super Bowl commercial with a nod to oddly enough Orwell’s 1984
The UK agreed to to transfer power from Hong Kong to communist China while Hong Kong could retain it’s capitalistic democracy for fifty years more

A new virus had been identified, labeled as Aids continued its’ deadly march across the land
In 1949 ideas like government changing facts, controlling businesses and the spread of communism were good reasons to have the book banned

Fast forward 36 years from 1984 and a new virus is identified and another pandemic is on the loose
Consumers buy products and download software that spies on them by the profiles they produce

1984 was over three decades ago but what was written still prevails
The government both foreign and domestic does have the ability to control foolish people as they unwittingly leave their digital trails

To Kill A Mockingbird

Told through the young eyes of Scout Finch the novel deals with racial injustice in a small southern town
Published in 1960 Harper Lee’s book demonstrated the way white people used ingrained prejudices to keep the black people down

Evidenced by the rape trial of an impoverished white woman’s pitiful power play
The daughter of the incestuous town drunk tempted a black man and the drunk hiding behind Jim Crow could not let it lay

Banned by both whites and blacks alike for language, racial and sexual overtones the book was thrown out of many libraries and schools
There’s a certain unwritten order to peoples’ existence based on skin color and one must follow the rules

The Democratic party by the civil rights act of 1964 tossed the people of color a bone
But much like the man on trial in Harper Lee’s story, everyone knows who’s in power behind the throne

As much as things change the more they seem the same
The fact that people shield their eyes to hide from the truth is the real shame

Top Secret Documents Revealed

IMG_1038Recently during a sweeping of the House Floor, the cleaning staff uncovered some top secret documents

These apparently came from a drunken democrat passed out at his desk after losing the impeachment arguments

He was found in a fetal position producing only moans and spit bubbles while covered with what looked like a torn up speech

He thought a last gasp vote might remove that trespassing oaf from office but the final tally proved out of reach

But as he was rolled over these forms were trapped between his briefcase and his flask

It seems as a member of a secret voter registration committee he had been assigned a task

Found in a pool of sweat were documents to relocate individuals claiming refugee status

Promised was a better life, healthcare and unemployment benefits all issued gratis

There was also a document to be signed that read “antes de obtener todas las cosas gratis usted debe registrarse para ser un demócrata”

Also included was a temporary work visa and a plane ticket to Imlay, Nevada

Roughly translated the statement says, “before you get all the free stuff you must sign up to be a democrat.

This figures a way to eliminate that vile Electoral College and let the republican party be a political doormat

The map shows distribution points for individuals claiming refugee status like product leaving a packer

All are sent to battleground states and followed on phones and computers by the democrat developed app tracker

Ensuring in a short time the red states now in majority will turn blue

And the progressive objectives of government dependence will be the rule and the dream of apple pie and American flag will be through

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