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A Daily Observer in Bad Poetry

Humor in Daily Life, Politics and Sports

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healthcare

Bernie Gets Part Of His Wishes For Only $2000000000000.00

The election is still eight months away and not a vote has been cast
Against Mr. Biden, Bernie’s just hanging on trying to outlast

But this nasty virus has with Bernie become a strange bedfellow
The Dems added pork to their package and turned the Republicans back bone to jello

The virus reached pandemic level on both coasts so Congress passed a bill to fight this plague
But the alleged goal of the stimulus package by both parties became a bit vague

Mr. Sanders has been adamant in free healthcare for all and the bill provides free testing
Next will be free treatment and that will be approved with no protesting

Because this is an election year the Democrats are striking while the virus is hot
With 75 million to the National Endowment For The Arts, someone hit the jackpot

To raise that much money PBS would have to sell a lot of Downton Abbey DVD’s
Hopefully there won’t be a lot of fund raising while the shut ins are fighting for their life from this disease

Bernie’s hatred of the wall received a positive update, 350 million for refugee resettlement
That’s good news for Mr. Sander’s borderless country and should aid in his contentment

There’s nothing like adding many new unskilled people to counties’ welfare rolls
But they’ll vote democrat and with Nancy’s idea of no ID for voting the dems will sweep the polls

The new refugees I’m sure are going to be a big help in righting the economy and fighting this virus
While the leaders of Congress can proudly say we passed this bill with out bias

Bernie should be down right gleeful about the US having to pay it’s citizens
Dependency on the government are all part of his far left visions

The money won’t be enough people living week to week will still be broke
It’s only a matter of time before another bill will be in front of Congress for them to invoke

America will sell it’s ideals and soul to try to right it’s economy with another stimulus bill
While the Chinese continue to eat their bats and perhaps morph the virus into one that can really kill

So Mr. Sanders stays in isolation but still gets some of his wishes granted without making a speech
Again the virus worked in his favor as Biden stumbles people don’t have to listen to Bernie preach

Let’s Party We Ain’t Scared. If We Get It, We Get It

He contracted the virus in the biology lab from a graduate assistant who had traveled abroad
He’d heard the news but in his ignorance the doomsayers with their catastrophic numbers just seemed flawed

At the semester’s end he gathered up four friends and headed for the Florida beaches for sun and fun
Other friends last year bragged about drinking fourteen cases of beer so they were out to prove they can’t be out done

His asymptomatic self now on the road for 1000 miles in close quarters with his friends
Drinking beer and sharing doobies at the end of finals is what his youthful wild side recommends

He stopped for gas while contaminating the pump handle and the candy rack from the Snickers bar he stuffed under his shirt
Saving more money for beer and making up time to catch the Saturday night beach concert

Arriving in Clearwater in early afternoon it was time to load up on beverages and hit the beach
The virus is spreading like wildfire but to him it’s party time and no time to listen to the newscasters preach

The girls were plentiful and many were willing to celebrate and share a good time
Besides everyone was there on their own free will and looking for fun, and that is not a crime

The gloved housekeeping staff were tasked with changing bed linens and towels
Trying not to touch their face while cleaning the sink and toilets after three days of drinking, bad eating and loose bowels

The five days were up before he knew it as the city denied access to the sand
So on the road again with a rolling stomach but satisfied, smug and tanned

Making a pit stop at a drug store and sorting through the antacids to quell that nauseous feeling
His friends demanded the break after eating two for a dollar roller grill hot dogs as they found his breath, burps and flatulence quite unappealing

Returning home he was forced to spend time with his family and grandparents since his college was closed
He wasn’t recovering from his trip that fast, feeling feverish, coughing and his opinion it was a sinus infection was misdiagnosed

He had just made a two thousand mile round trip with a contagious disease he had helped transmit
But it was a party and he wasn’t scared we get it, we all get it

Where was Granny’s Sack of Pills?


The auto call reminded me of the upcoming doctor’s appointment, to be 15 minutes early and bring all my medication
And judging by the patients in the waiting room one of the side effects of their medication had to be constipation

My Granny was a sweet woman with admirable baking skills but not a sack of pills
Sure she buttered her toast and fried her chicken but only had aspirin to cure her ills

A lot of today’s “diseases” hadn’t been invented such as high cholesterol and bone density
Granny never experienced a doctor’s lecture about thinning bones with the stare of cyborg intensity

She stayed active, tended her garden, cared for the grand kids and in winter was careful on ice
She spent her income wisely, used coupons as her purchases were always the lowest price

And she knew as she aged, she’d never be thirty again
But this is now and that was then

Grandpa smoked his Luckies, shaved every day and built shelves in his shed
He ate what Granny fixed, commented on the news and at 86 dropped dead

He never heard about high cholesterol, macular degeneration, osteoporosis or low T
Due to age occasionally claimed to be “stove up” but was only aware of his heart when he and the Parson would disagree

Perhaps our elderly were fortunate not to have their standard of living dictated by Big Pharma
They survived on their relationships with others, common sense and positive karma

They didn’t see a parade of specialists, given a pamphlet with perplexing statistics and be assigned a new high priced drug

But most of all never sat in a waiting room with two patients and five buttoned down Pharmaceutical reps all looking smug

But I had the Shot

The flu season is upon us, over arched eyebrows the local news person is advising the shot

The stick is easier than trying to justify your illness at the clinic with “I forgot”

Just don’t celebrate the vaccination event at your favorite diner

Because germs congregate there to turn one into a nose dripping whiner

How is that possible it’s asked, the place always looks so clean

Oh there is an effort made, it’s not the plates, flatware or cuisine

But realize in the restroom a sign states employees must wash hands before returning to work

However after washing all that is offered is an ineffective blower making it easier to wipe hands on pants where the bad germs lurk

At your seat you’re handed a laminated menu that may have been wiped down once before stacking in the hostess’ rack

But the velcro sound made when turning the pages makes one wonder if the stickiness is a disease waiting to attack

Deciding on the salad bar and half sandwich with fries you head to the bar

But the idea of grabbing the same serving tongs as the stressed daycare worker and the twelve people before her is really quite bizarre

After the salad the food is delivered and you reach for the ketchup to slather on your fries

This is the same bottle handled by the pale looking kid with goop oozing out of his eyes

But you enjoy the meal and return to the job secure in the knowledge you’ve had the vaccine

A couple of hours later your stomach feels queasy and coworkers are remarking how you look a little green

Then it hits, suddenly your mouth waters and you head to the restroom at a fast trot

Over retching sounds while trying to maintain your dignity you question the value of the shot

Land of the Free

Hello Folks, I appreciate all of you coming out on this cold night
After watching the events of the past years, I know how to have the citizens unite

My slogan here after will be “Make America Reliant Again”
I’ll let the people know the country is there to serve them and not run by a conman

I’m announcing I’m running for President and this I guarantee
We will make America fair to all and the land of the stuff that’s free

Forget that nonsense about asking what you can do for your country
We’re giving everything free without any collusion or a FBI dossier

Here’s my agenda, I’ll lay it out for all to see
And I’m sure most of you out there will agree

First thing we’re gonna open the border and tear down that wall
We’ll welcome all unvetted people warts and all

Next all newcomers whether a resident or not we’ll give the right to vote
They can cast a ballot before their feet are dry from jumping off the boat

I’m convinced they’ll vote in large numbers for the one giving the most free stuff
That candidate will be me, I’ll happily supply all wants and whims for free, sure enough

We’ll let all people vote at sixteen, I mean they are old enough to drive and have a kid
Who am I to block a sophomore in high school ideas’ of government, God forbid

While I’m at it, I’m going to promote the legalization of pot
There’s nothing like an ocean of people who’d rather be high and with welfare not do squat

Because I’m pushing for a federal wage guarantee, security for those unwilling to to work
I mean why work if you don’t have too and look like a do gooder jerk

Also don’t ever worry about sickness as our healthcare for all will take care of you
Ignore the fact your doctor arrived from a third world nation being paddled by six lepers in a bamboo canoe

Finally to keep people like me in power the Electoral College is going away
We refuse to honor a process that keeps all states equal and ends like Hillary’s dismay

If my promises ring hollow and my thoughts of making America reliant you disregard
Just remember, for those that don’t follow me I’ll be happy to pull the racist card.

Remembrance of Yesterday Blues

Well since my baby parked me
I’ve got a new place to dwell
It’s down at the end of Lonely Street
At Memory Care Hotel

Though the brochure seemed cheery
It’s fifty five grand a room
Warehoused dejected elderly
Try to smile through their gloom

You’ve made me so lonely baby
I get so lonely
Guess I’ll be lonely till I die

The food is to be Chef quality
But cold dinners out of a can
Can break a person’s spirit
Saving expenses is the meal plan

The healthcare seems basic
A retired doctor checks your ills
While you waste away in bed
The night staff steals your pain pills

I’m sorry your mom had to die
And my health is failing
Now your idea of contact
Is an occasional call and e-mailing

You’ve made me so lonely baby
I get so lonely
Guess I’ll be lonely till I die

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