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Maybe You’ll Tolerate This Drug Better

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines tolerate: to endure or resist the action of (something, such as drugs or food) without serious side effects or discomfort

The doctors casually throw this word around to patients when the last drug prescribed caused them to hurt

Still not reducing the size of the baggie filled with prescription bottles of assigned pills

All in an attempt of reducing this patient’s misery and hoping the interaction with the other eight prescribed medicines isn’t what kills

Big Pharma might be pleased with the results. Just maybe this will be a commonly prescribed drug as the test rats are still alive

And if the patient can survive another five years, we can all pat ourselves on the back on how long the patient can survive

Then Big Pharma can lean on the insurance companies, the insurance companies their hospital groups, and the hospital groups their associated physicians

And should the patient balk at a new higher priced drug, the doctors have been programmed to say this drug might be their last chance given their conditions

The boardroom will be a happy place as this drug plus the other eight will make this individual worth 156 grand

And by tying in the insurance companies and their associated hospital groups, we can increase demand

We don’t ever want to address the root cause of this malady as that would end our never ending payday

And cause our ever-growing house of cards to collapse and decay

We can put this pill in a TV ad with a paid actor’s sworn testimony

And potential customers will eat it up not reading the fine print as they would see the ad as phony

Statistics will become a factor. Of the 1000 people not taking this drug (regardless of lifestyle) three people died

And only one person died of the 1000 taking the drug so one would have a 68% of not surviving if you don’t take this drug or so the stats implied

So if you can tolerate this drug and the side effects don’t cripple your lifestyle, you can join the happy people from the ad on the beach kicking up sand

And you’ll never know to that drug company you’re only worth 156 grand

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Blink Away! Damn Ye!

The bill had shown up in yesterday’s mail. The physician had billed the insurance company, but the company had only paid 25%

After paying the standard $50 co-pay you had hoped the insurance company would cover the balance over what you’d already spent

But here it is. An additional charge of $410 for a ten-minute consultation with a PA and a standard throat culture

You mistakenly figured the $165 withheld from every paycheck would cover something but there you were, miserable, being eyed like roadkill from a vulture

Therefore you brought up your laptop to find the doctor’s portal checking to see if the bill was in order

And sure enough, the never seen doctor has signed off on the charge much to your horror

Now having to turn to your little book filled with usernames and passwords, to find your current insurance provider

As usual the crossouts, write-overs, and highlighted words in the insurance section resembled a web created by a drunken spider

Typing in the eight letters and symbols thought to create the current strong password, you hit submit

Instantly the red sentence appears advising the password entered is incorrect please readmit

Sent again after carefully typing the letters and symbols, the same warning appeared along with the annoying grating question of “forgot password?”

The swearing that followed cleared three days of phlegm from the irritated throat and echoed off the walls, but your cat was the only one that heard

So you went to the live chat. That digital friend that beckons you to ask a question

After identifying yourself with your insurance card and birthdate the screen pops with “a service representative will be with you shortly,” doing nothing for your now bubbling indigestion

“Ob-li-dee Ob-li-da” the soft tones of the Harmonica Cats droned on interrupted only with “Your call is very important to us, please continue to hold”

After twenty-five minutes with your bladder at def-con 4, the announcement appeared that you are currently next in line to be consoled

Meanwhile, in the Delhi, India call center the employees are engaged in the game of best time slots given to the number of calls taken

But the one flashing message had your anticipation growing that you would not be forsaken

Unfortunately your call had been routed to Bugwan going by his call center name of Steven

Bugwan it seems has a bad attitude and currently has nine hours left on late shift as his track record has been uneven

As you’re staring at the screen for ten straight minutes waiting for someone to pick up, “Ob-La-de”

Steven stares at his console munching on yesterday’s Balti Chicken thinking “Blink away Damn Ye”

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Price Controls, Gouging, and Groceries

Recently the Democratic nominee and VP of the US accused grocery stores of price gouging their shoppers

In trying to sound like she’s concerned and trying to deflect the effect of her personally endorsed Bidenomics, she’s telling another one of her socialist whoppers

Since the price of groceries affect everyone the grocery stores were easy prey for the bobblehead democrat bottom feeders

And by stating she’ll institute price controls where she feels necessary she flashed her socialist credentials just like other failed leaders

There are many products and services that could be rightfully accused of price gouging but groceries ain’t one of them

Starting with a simple product with a couple more to follow, these are products she might try to condemn

Greeting cards used to be a mainstay of the daily mail. A simple note of warm wishes and all was well

Now for a picture of a cute kitty and a happy birthday message, to forward that sentiment $5.99 is what you’ll shell

Mobile phones used to have roaming charges. A very limited area in which calls were included in your plan and outside that (usually the end of your driveway) the price of any call would jump

Now all the plans have their own ways of extracting your hard-earned dough from your wallet as it all comes out of the hidden charges in a monthly lump

The healthcare industry has gotten away with highway robbery for years

Now because the insurance companies are calling the shots, for any kind of malaise you’ll need to see multiple doctors for colds, cuts, and pap smears

The docs all need their piece of the pie since insurance companies are making money from them and the insured hand over fist

The doctors have had to put their patients on a medical merry-go-round just to remove a cyst

TV used to be simple. A person could erect an antennae and get three network stations and if near a city maybe on a clear night get a UHF station

Now with cable and streaming services for only $99.99 one can get the same stations, some completely unwatchable programs, and stations that only appeal 1% of the population

There are many industries that have made their billions by price gouging the consumer year in and year out

But don’t pick on the grocers like some ranting ignorant lout

Because people know when they’re cash strapped due to your inflation, and they’re trying to get their family something to eat

You’ll find them at the discount food warehouses looking for dented cans of 59 cent black eyes and “use by tomorrow” gray meat

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Phone In Your Life

Recently Costco announced they will be starting a health line for virtual doctors checkups and assistance

This would really aid their clientele previously hampered by constraints involving time and distance

As low as $29 for a primary care visit and up to $79 for a mental health call

Just go to the Costco Pharmacy homepage, check the prices, see what time slots are available, and schedule your appointment. A true convenience for all

Surprisingly Costco doesn’t make you trudge across an enormous parking lot, wait in the weather to show your membership card, and look for needed items approximately six football fields away

Then after buying fifty of an item when you only needed one, and after a cavity search at the exit, they wish you a “good day”

Amazon also offers healthcare through their Amazon Clinics, also a virtual visit in an effort to keep healthcare costs down

Of course being Amazon, when the virtual doctor breaks the bad news about granny’s dizziness diagnosis, they’ll offer you twenty-eight varieties of a hospital gown

And based on your browsing history you might be interested in this handcrafted coffin rated at 4 1/2 stars with free delivery and if ordered by six o’clock will be here on the third

So if all goes right and the funeral director is on his game, there shouldn’t be a hitch getting granny interred

In this crazy world of increasing prices and escalating violence the public has turned to phone communication only with almost no face to face

Food and grocery delivery, virtual doctors visits, financial advice from a phone, the world has lost that personal touch and that is a disgrace

Eventually tradesmen will join the fray and offer services by the minute like a psychic hot line

They all will offer a 800 line as a do it yourself advisor, offer tips and instruction, let you do the work while they sit back and recline

Evidenced by Mr Kilowatt the electric repair service now offering their own version of a phone fix it

Advertising the economy of using your phone with no service call, and secretly hoping you don’t end up looking like a chicken on a barbecue spit

So sell that gas guzzling SUV. You won’t need a car anymore as everything will now be accomplished by your phone

Forget about your kids. The public schools will own them. You’ll sit in your lonely government mandated room scrolling through meaningless messages wishing you had listened. But now it’s too late to do anything but cry and moan

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You Can Keep Your Doctor

The uninformed were cheering, this is a plan to save us all and the Big Guy is terrific

The Bidencare plan had been implemented and the list of in-network doctors was specific

What seemed like a cool refreshing oasis turned into just another mirage

It seems most doctors with real degrees went to cash only clinics and left very few physicians in the Biden entourage

The VA docs were bailing as the new administration was ordering them to administer to the horde of illegal alien diseases

Leaving veterans once again at the back of the line behind immigrants looking for free healthcare while trying to avoid their sneezes

The number of in-network MD’s under the new improved Bidencare had dwindled to three physicians

The good news is these “experts” were taking new patients including those with pre-conditions

First up was Bill Gates. Bill was a computer nerd tapped by the new IBM home computer market to use his software

His pocket protector must be enshrined in the Geek Hall of Fame as he became a multi-billionaire

Because he does support the causes he believes in, his Foundation aids in squashing the pandemic

Since money buys power he feels he has the authority to advise peoples’ behavior to stop the world wide epidemic

Next up is Doctor Anthony Fauci, the ongoing voice of doom and despair currently reveling in his fifteen minutes of fame

An alleged expert, Dr Fauci was disastrously wrong about many of his predictions. Now Biden rewarded him as chief medical advisor and that’s a shame

Finally we get to Granny Clampett, a simple woman dedicated to curing peoples’ ills

Having no use for “city doctors” using multiple visits and tests to heal the chills

Not needing money Granny would be open to bartering for her expertise

A shot of her rheumatiz medicine and some homemade tonic were the remedies of choice as she holds no degrees

Of the three choices I’m sticking with Granny as on her approach to healing and her bedside manner I’ve come to rely

Besides I might just get to sit down at the fancy eating table for vittles of buzzard eggs and possum pie

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Bernie Gets Part Of His Wishes For Only $2000000000000.00

The election is still eight months away and not a vote has been cast
Against Mr. Biden, Bernie’s just hanging on trying to outlast

But this nasty virus has with Bernie become a strange bedfellow
The Dems added pork to their package and turned the Republicans back bone to jello

The virus reached pandemic level on both coasts so Congress passed a bill to fight this plague
But the alleged goal of the stimulus package by both parties became a bit vague

Mr. Sanders has been adamant in free healthcare for all and the bill provides free testing
Next will be free treatment and that will be approved with no protesting

Because this is an election year the Democrats are striking while the virus is hot
With 75 million to the National Endowment For The Arts, someone hit the jackpot

To raise that much money PBS would have to sell a lot of Downton Abbey DVD’s
Hopefully there won’t be a lot of fund raising while the shut ins are fighting for their life from this disease

Bernie’s hatred of the wall received a positive update, 350 million for refugee resettlement
That’s good news for Mr. Sander’s borderless country and should aid in his contentment

There’s nothing like adding many new unskilled people to counties’ welfare rolls
But they’ll vote democrat and with Nancy’s idea of no ID for voting the dems will sweep the polls

The new refugees I’m sure are going to be a big help in righting the economy and fighting this virus
While the leaders of Congress can proudly say we passed this bill with out bias

Bernie should be down right gleeful about the US having to pay it’s citizens
Dependency on the government are all part of his far left visions

The money won’t be enough people living week to week will still be broke
It’s only a matter of time before another bill will be in front of Congress for them to invoke

America will sell it’s ideals and soul to try to right it’s economy with another stimulus bill
While the Chinese continue to eat their bats and perhaps morph the virus into one that can really kill

So Mr. Sanders stays in isolation but still gets some of his wishes granted without making a speech
Again the virus worked in his favor as Biden stumbles people don’t have to listen to Bernie preach

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Let’s Party We Ain’t Scared. If We Get It, We Get It

He contracted the virus in the biology lab from a graduate assistant who had traveled abroad
He’d heard the news but in his ignorance the doomsayers with their catastrophic numbers just seemed flawed

At the semester’s end he gathered up four friends and headed for the Florida beaches for sun and fun
Other friends last year bragged about drinking fourteen cases of beer so they were out to prove they can’t be out done

His asymptomatic self now on the road for 1000 miles in close quarters with his friends
Drinking beer and sharing doobies at the end of finals is what his youthful wild side recommends

He stopped for gas while contaminating the pump handle and the candy rack from the Snickers bar he stuffed under his shirt
Saving more money for beer and making up time to catch the Saturday night beach concert

Arriving in Clearwater in early afternoon it was time to load up on beverages and hit the beach
The virus is spreading like wildfire but to him it’s party time and no time to listen to the newscasters preach

The girls were plentiful and many were willing to celebrate and share a good time
Besides everyone was there on their own free will and looking for fun, and that is not a crime

The gloved housekeeping staff were tasked with changing bed linens and towels
Trying not to touch their face while cleaning the sink and toilets after three days of drinking, bad eating and loose bowels

The five days were up before he knew it as the city denied access to the sand
So on the road again with a rolling stomach but satisfied, smug and tanned

Making a pit stop at a drug store and sorting through the antacids to quell that nauseous feeling
His friends demanded the break after eating two for a dollar roller grill hot dogs as they found his breath, burps and flatulence quite unappealing

Returning home he was forced to spend time with his family and grandparents since his college was closed
He wasn’t recovering from his trip that fast, feeling feverish, coughing and his opinion it was a sinus infection was misdiagnosed

He had just made a two thousand mile round trip with a contagious disease he had helped transmit
But it was a party and he wasn’t scared we get it, we all get it

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Where was Granny’s Sack of Pills?


The auto call reminded me of the upcoming doctor’s appointment, to be 15 minutes early and bring all my medication
And judging by the patients in the waiting room one of the side effects of their medication had to be constipation

My Granny was a sweet woman with admirable baking skills but not a sack of pills
Sure she buttered her toast and fried her chicken but only had aspirin to cure her ills

A lot of today’s “diseases” hadn’t been invented such as high cholesterol and bone density
Granny never experienced a doctor’s lecture about thinning bones with the stare of cyborg intensity

She stayed active, tended her garden, cared for the grand kids and in winter was careful on ice
She spent her income wisely, used coupons as her purchases were always the lowest price

And she knew as she aged, she’d never be thirty again
But this is now and that was then

Grandpa smoked his Luckies, shaved every day and built shelves in his shed
He ate what Granny fixed, commented on the news and at 86 dropped dead

He never heard about high cholesterol, macular degeneration, osteoporosis or low T
Due to age occasionally claimed to be “stove up” but was only aware of his heart when he and the Parson would disagree

Perhaps our elderly were fortunate not to have their standard of living dictated by Big Pharma
They survived on their relationships with others, common sense and positive karma

They didn’t see a parade of specialists, given a pamphlet with perplexing statistics and be assigned a new high priced drug

But most of all never sat in a waiting room with two patients and five buttoned down Pharmaceutical reps all looking smug

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But I had the Shot

The flu season is upon us, over arched eyebrows the local news person is advising the shot

The stick is easier than trying to justify your illness at the clinic with “I forgot”

Just don’t celebrate the vaccination event at your favorite diner

Because germs congregate there to turn one into a nose dripping whiner

How is that possible it’s asked, the place always looks so clean

Oh there is an effort made, it’s not the plates, flatware or cuisine

But realize in the restroom a sign states employees must wash hands before returning to work

However after washing all that is offered is an ineffective blower making it easier to wipe hands on pants where the bad germs lurk

At your seat you’re handed a laminated menu that may have been wiped down once before stacking in the hostess’ rack

But the velcro sound made when turning the pages makes one wonder if the stickiness is a disease waiting to attack

Deciding on the salad bar and half sandwich with fries you head to the bar

But the idea of grabbing the same serving tongs as the stressed daycare worker and the twelve people before her is really quite bizarre

After the salad the food is delivered and you reach for the ketchup to slather on your fries

This is the same bottle handled by the pale looking kid with goop oozing out of his eyes

But you enjoy the meal and return to the job secure in the knowledge you’ve had the vaccine

A couple of hours later your stomach feels queasy and coworkers are remarking how you look a little green

Then it hits, suddenly your mouth waters and you head to the restroom at a fast trot

Over retching sounds while trying to maintain your dignity you question the value of the shot

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Land of the Free

Hello Folks, I appreciate all of you coming out on this cold night
After watching the events of the past years, I know how to have the citizens unite

My slogan here after will be “Make America Reliant Again”
I’ll let the people know the country is there to serve them and not run by a conman

I’m announcing I’m running for President and this I guarantee
We will make America fair to all and the land of the stuff that’s free

Forget that nonsense about asking what you can do for your country
We’re giving everything free without any collusion or a FBI dossier

Here’s my agenda, I’ll lay it out for all to see
And I’m sure most of you out there will agree

First thing we’re gonna open the border and tear down that wall
We’ll welcome all unvetted people warts and all

Next all newcomers whether a resident or not we’ll give the right to vote
They can cast a ballot before their feet are dry from jumping off the boat

I’m convinced they’ll vote in large numbers for the one giving the most free stuff
That candidate will be me, I’ll happily supply all wants and whims for free, sure enough

We’ll let all people vote at sixteen, I mean they are old enough to drive and have a kid
Who am I to block a sophomore in high school ideas’ of government, God forbid

While I’m at it, I’m going to promote the legalization of pot
There’s nothing like an ocean of people who’d rather be high and with welfare not do squat

Because I’m pushing for a federal wage guarantee, security for those unwilling to to work
I mean why work if you don’t have too and look like a do gooder jerk

Also don’t ever worry about sickness as our healthcare for all will take care of you
Ignore the fact your doctor arrived from a third world nation being paddled by six lepers in a bamboo canoe

Finally to keep people like me in power the Electoral College is going away
We refuse to honor a process that keeps all states equal and ends like Hillary’s dismay

If my promises ring hollow and my thoughts of making America reliant you disregard
Just remember, for those that don’t follow me I’ll be happy to pull the racist card.

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Remembrance of Yesterday Blues

Well since my baby parked me
I’ve got a new place to dwell
It’s down at the end of Lonely Street
At Memory Care Hotel

Though the brochure seemed cheery
It’s fifty five grand a room
Warehoused dejected elderly
Try to smile through their gloom

You’ve made me so lonely baby
I get so lonely
Guess I’ll be lonely till I die

The food is to be Chef quality
But cold dinners out of a can
Can break a person’s spirit
Saving expenses is the meal plan

The healthcare seems basic
A retired doctor checks your ills
While you waste away in bed
The night staff steals your pain pills

I’m sorry your mom had to die
And my health is failing
Now your idea of contact
Is an occasional call and e-mailing

You’ve made me so lonely baby
I get so lonely
Guess I’ll be lonely till I die

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