The staff finally had the room ready to go. The withered body had been removed along with the glazed doughnut that had been the obvious clue

The congressman serving his 18th consecutive term, pronounced by the EMTs had apparently been dead since the last session was through

“The doughnut was untouched and he did seem remarkedly quiet,” stated a committee member.

“Would you look at that doughnut,” stated another. “It still looks good and it’s been on the plate since November”

The committee then offered up a quick moment of silence before getting back to work but decided against the morning snacks

It was time to grill another witness, the hot dog cart guy, to see if he had viewed any of the alleged attacks

He was the 897th witness who would do his best to offer his take on that fateful morning with his rapidly fading mind

Hopefully something useful might come from this mustard splashed dude as most of the previous witnesses were two blocks away, stoned, or blind

The committee was doing its utmost to make this taxpayer funded charade seem relevant

Fueled by panic, this crew was really frightened of this sham turning into a massive white elephant

Like a giant cumbersome sloth, the group had produced nothing credible that would aid in capturing their elusive quarry

The easily bored American public had long ago turned their backs on this self-serving democratic story

The fact Capitol Police held doors open for the masses to storm through, the woke Pentagon denying requests for National Guard help, and the only gunfire killed a civilian

Makes this an exercise in futility, a waste of time, money and suggests this entire episode as vaudevillian

Yet they plod on. Since the committee formation, two members have decided not to run for re-election, one was voted out, and a remaining member vigorously defends his Steele dossier lie

It would be in the best interest of America for this committee to just pack their bags and say goodbye