The bill had shown up in yesterday’s mail. The physician had billed the insurance company, but the company had only paid 25%

After paying the standard $50 co-pay you had hoped the insurance company would cover the balance over what you’d already spent

But here it is. An additional charge of $410 for a ten-minute consultation with a PA and a standard throat culture

You mistakenly figured the $165 withheld from every paycheck would cover something but there you were, miserable, being eyed like roadkill from a vulture

Therefore you brought up your laptop to find the doctor’s portal checking to see if the bill was in order

And sure enough, the never seen doctor has signed off on the charge much to your horror

Now having to turn to your little book filled with usernames and passwords, to find your current insurance provider

As usual the crossouts, write-overs, and highlighted words in the insurance section resembled a web created by a drunken spider

Typing in the eight letters and symbols thought to create the current strong password, you hit submit

Instantly the red sentence appears advising the password entered is incorrect please readmit

Sent again after carefully typing the letters and symbols, the same warning appeared along with the annoying grating question of “forgot password?”

The swearing that followed cleared three days of phlegm from the irritated throat and echoed off the walls, but your cat was the only one that heard

So you went to the live chat. That digital friend that beckons you to ask a question

After identifying yourself with your insurance card and birthdate the screen pops with “a service representative will be with you shortly,” doing nothing for your now bubbling indigestion

“Ob-li-dee Ob-li-da” the soft tones of the Harmonica Cats droned on interrupted only with “Your call is very important to us, please continue to hold”

After twenty-five minutes with your bladder at def-con 4, the announcement appeared that you are currently next in line to be consoled

Meanwhile, in the Delhi, India call center the employees are engaged in the game of best time slots given to the number of calls taken

But the one flashing message had your anticipation growing that you would not be forsaken

Unfortunately your call had been routed to Bugwan going by his call center name of Steven

Bugwan it seems has a bad attitude and currently has nine hours left on late shift as his track record has been uneven

As you’re staring at the screen for ten straight minutes waiting for someone to pick up, “Ob-La-de”

Steven stares at his console munching on yesterday’s Balti Chicken thinking “Blink away Damn Ye”